Thursday, December 24, 2009

Winter Retreat '09

was exactly what I needed.

God refreshed me through the small group I was leading. I was reminded of how much I love discipling people and helping them grow stronger in their faith and hearing how God is working in their lives. Also, when you pour out, God fills you up again. Perhaps this past semester was not fulfilling partially because I didn't do any discipleship.

Also, it was nice just being around people I've known for so long. I felt like myself for the first time in a while.

And happy birthday, you know who you are.

Thursday, December 17, 2009

What, I'm going home?

There's no closure. I feel like I'll still be going to finance and marketing class next week, and that final exams didn't cap off the semester. My mom called today and said, "I'll see you tomorrow!" which was very strange to hear since it still hasn't really hit me that I'll be gone from WashU for a month with no studying to do.

So to try to get me thinking about winter break, here are some things I look forward to.
- reading books for fun! (Outliers, Love is an Orientation, The Jesus I Never Knew)
- watching Hulu, HBO, and playing sudoku
- hanging out with my brother.
- Winter Retreat with ACCCN
- having time to sit, think and reflect
- be still and listen
**On another note, WHAT?! Christmas is next week?!**

Saturday, December 12, 2009


There's something about cleaning that is just so gratifying. Perhaps it is the feeling of accomplishment, or maybe the perception of order. Anyway, I clean when I'm stressed and have time.

It is funny to see what kind of things that are left laying around. If these things are not dealt with at the moment, they can easily be forgotten and left to rot. For instance, my mom bought me this massive loaf of bread to take for the drive after Thanksgiving. It has been on our shelf for three weeks now and white fuzz colonies have grown on the bread. Also, there are these apples, pears and oranges that I found on top of our refrigerator. They were starting to mold and ferment and were soft to the touch. Needless to say, I threw all that away. I wiped the table tops and fabreezed the room. Much much better.

To look at this metaphorically, there are issues in our lives that we leave unattended. Perhaps a broken relationship, selfish tendencies, different sin issues... whatever it may be, if we don't deal with it as soon as possible, the more likely it will be forgotten and left to rot and ferment. There is no fruit in doing this, but only decay. It'll eat you up.

And Jesus is the cleaner, who comes to take our nastiness and throw it away, to clean us up, and leave us with His beautiful aroma.

Friday, December 11, 2009

Sudoku Fix

Heh heh.

Now that I finished my finals for the week, I let myself play some sudoku and I got my best time of 4.28 minutes! Ah, sweet release.

What I've realized this week is that I have addictive tendencies. Staying away from Sudoku was ridiculously hard. But thanks to friends who can keep me accountable, I abstained from the number puzzle.

I love my family

I got an email from my mom today suggesting...

"How about we skip the Christmas gifts for each other and save money and donate to a cause? It's $144 pledge for the whole family. This money will be enough to support a whole family for their food in one year."

I'm so proud of my mom for suggesting this. I'm really excited. She's right, we've been blessed with everything that we need. Instead of buying gifts that we really do not need and spending hours thinking of what to get each other, we can give something to people who are in need of necessities.

Kingdom for the win!

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

Financial Responsibility

We're called to live a life surrendered to God. Last year after reading the book Kingdom Come by Allen Wakabayashi, I gained more perspective on what that looked like. Since then, I've been trying to actively surrender different areas of my life under His Lordship. It's saying, "God, I haven't been using these things for your Kingdom, but for my own purposes. Now I want to give back to you what you've bestowed to me."

There is one school of thought where everything should change at once. I suppose it could in an ideal world. However, I'm just going to take it slowly and intentionally focus on one or two areas at a time and do it well. (Not to say that by the time I move onto the next area that the previous areas will look Holy or anything, but I'm trying.)

Areas I've worked on:
- Time Management: how to be a good student and leave time for relationships
- Academics/Career: how to use my professional career to bring God's righteousness, ethics, grace and mercy to the world

Current Areas:
- Bible in a year: be fed by the Word of God
- Diet: how to glorify God with the things I eat (Vegetarian)
- Financial Responsibility: how to use my resources wisely (budgeting)

Next Phase: TBD
I'll figure that out later, either for a New Year's Resolution or for whenever. It's most likely something relating to exercise. I recently read the passage where our body is the temple of God. I realize, I don't really treat my body like a temple of God! Don't rest well by sleeping enough. Don't exercise. Eat crap. So that's definitely one area of my life that I could improve.

More posts later on how things have been with how the Kingdom has been playing a part in those areas of my life.

Monday, December 7, 2009


could also be the ruin of me. I'm addicted.

Saturday, December 5, 2009


Where the hell do I get my expectations from?

They'll be the ruin of me.

God help me to see clearly...

Thursday, December 3, 2009

Why I'm a Vegetarian

So in these past few hours since Katie left her comment (hi Katie!) correcting that the eggs we eat aren't fertilized, I was much relieved but decided to do some more research. While Googling "chicken eggs," I stumbled across this website.

When you have five minutes, consider watching this video. It is slightly disturbing, but bearable. Most of all, it is informative.

Mass produced chicken in a nutshell:
- stuck in cages, no room to walk. sit on top of each other
- Chicken have never stretched out their wings
- They pee and poop on each other (cages from above)
- Loses its feathers. (splotchy balding)
- Their heads, wings, or feet can easily get stuck in the cage. Left to die of other hens stepping, clawing, and pecking at it. Or it dies of starvation and thirst since it can't move.
- The eggs aren't sanitary. They touch the rotting hen corpses.

They are a means to an end, the egg.

So as you may know, near the end of the summer, I decided to try out being a vegetarian for a year. The reasons I began were slightly naive, but as time progresses, my reasons for staying a vegetarian are solidifying.

After watching this clip, it confirms one reason that I am a vegetarian. Jeremy, you mentioned that animal rights was a paradox, which is true. So just to clarify, I am okay with the actual final killing and eating of an animal. I do believe that God provided animals as resources for us to eat, like how He provided trees for us to build with. However, God wanted us to be good stewards of His resources. These chicken have never seen natural light! They live a rotten life, literally. I believe that while they are alive, they should not suffer when it can be prevented. I honestly don't think this is what it was created to be.

What's the original reason I became a vegetarian? It's somewhere along the same lines.

ISAIAH 11:6-9
6 The wolf will live with the lamb,
the leopard will lie down with the goat,
the calf and the lion and the yearling [a] together;
and a little child will lead them.

7 The cow will feed with the bear,
their young will lie down together,
and the lion will eat straw like the ox.

8 The infant will play near the hole of the cobra,
and the young child put his hand into the viper's nest.

9 They will neither harm nor destroy
on all my holy mountain,
for the earth will be full of the knowledge of the LORD
as the waters cover the sea.

I was reading this passage that is talking about what the Kingdom of Heaven should look like and what it will look like. Basically, natural prey and predators will be at peace. There will be no fear and destruction, but peace and harmony. If as Christians we are supposed to bring qualities of the Kingdom to earth, then perhaps I shouldn't eat meat.

An Biblical argument against this would be more of a legalistic thing. After all, God and Jesus in the New Testament straight up tell the disciples they won't be considered unclean by what they eat. "Kill and eat... do not call anything impure that God has made clean." (Acts 10:13-15), Jesus declares all food clean (Mark 7:19).

However my argument for that is "Everything is permissible, but not everything is beneficial." (1 Cor 10:23). So yeah, we CAN do anything, but it doesn't mean what we do is for good.

So in the end, I'm still a vegetarian because its one way of restoring what the world was created to be. I do eat seafood though, because they aren't abused as much and there aren't very many vegetarian options in the world yet.

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Thanksgiving Break

On the drive back up from Atlanta, I learned that eggs are real chicken babies. That was a life changing moment. Now I feel bad for eating eggs. I always thought they were unfertilized eggs, kinda like how girls just have periods. That's why I didn't feel bad eating them (now that I think about it, that's kinda a gross idea too). But its like eating an-almost fetus! Sigh... I don't know if I'll be able to cut down on eggs though.

On another note, people, I'm back.